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So you think you’re dating the perfect woman…

You immediately hit it off with her, she looks amazing, your friends love her…only something isn’t quite right.

Arguments keep breaking out and tension is building up.

When things aren’t going right, it’s important to recognize red flags.

Identify them sooner rather than later and you can work to resolve issues or end the relationship before anyone gets hurt.

The problem is, some red flags are agonizingly subtle, particularly when you’ve only known a girl for a short period of time.

I’ve had my share of rocky relationships and wish I’d learned to recognize these months earlier than I did.

That’s why I’ve plugged myself into the Reddit hivemind to save you the pain and share the most common red flags men have noticed, often too late to save themselves:

Click Here To Watch – 10 Red Flags In Women You Should NEVER Ignore

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These first four points come as a package deal. They are the result of the 40 years experience John Gottman has as a recognized relationship expert and professor emeritus at the University of Washington. He says men should be on the lookout for criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. Together, he calls them the four horsemen of an apocalyptic relationship.

Relationship Red Flags In Women #1 She Criticizes You

Now there’s a big difference between complaining and criticizing:

Complaining is “I was concerned when you were running late and didn’t call me.”

Criticizing is “You’re not forgetful, you’re selfish. You never think of me!”

See the difference?

Everyone lashes out and criticizes from time to time, we’re only human. But, repeatedly using you as an emotional punching bag shouldn’t be tolerated and can lead to the other three horsemen.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #2 She Treats You With Contempt

To treat someone with contempt means using mockery, sarcasm and disrespect. Essentially, it means your girlfriend is not taking discussions seriously.

What effect is this going to have on you? It will make you feel unloved and devalued. Nobody deserves this, so if this seems familiar you should try to work on this as a couple.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #3 She Gets Defensive

The third horseman of an apocalyptic relationship comes in the form of blaming other people for their own problems.

When someone makes a mistake, they can either say sorry and admit they made a mistake or defend themself. Defensiveness will only escalate the conflict though, it places the blame on someone else.

In life, but especially in a relationship, ‘sorry’ is a golden word. If your girlfriend won’t say it to you and own her mistakes (because nobody is flawless) then this is a sign you

(Pro tip: saying “I’m sorry you’re upset” doesn’t count!)


Relationship Red Flags In Women#4 She Stonewalls You

Stonewalling is an alternative route to contempt that people in a relationship sometimes take. Instead of your girlfriend not taking a conversation seriously, she refuses to engage.

John Gottman says refusing to talk, acting busy or otherwise evading and refusing to participate with you means your girlfriend is physiologically flooded and is not in a place where she can have a rational discussion.

If this sounds familiar, you need to take a break. For some people, it could be as little as 20 minutes just to calm down, for others it could be days or more in which case you might want to consider if you are committed to the relationship.

This next red flag I saw come up frequently on Reddit:


Relationship Red Flags In Women#5 She Has Different Cleaning Habits To You

red flags in women

This seems small, right? Moving into a place with your girlfriend can be a really exciting moment in a relationship.

Yet, it could lead to arguments, here’s why:

Does your girlfriend like things tidier? She will always be upset with you for not cleaning up more often.

Does your girlfriend not tidy up after herself? She will become increasingly frustrated she can’t leave things where they are.

The frustration between the two of you will build over time and this is a deeply ingrained habit that is very hard to change. It’s not impossible to overcome, but I strongly suggest you find out how tidy your girlfriend is before making any major decisions.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #6 She Has Poor Self-Esteem

This red flag might seem harsh, but it’s the truth.

If your girlfriend cannot make themselves happy, they will drain all your willpower and mental energy trying to do it for them.

Everyone needs an emotional pick-me-up now and then. How is she going to do that for you though if you have to be constantly ready to support for her?

One of the hardest lessons in life I’ve had to learn is: You have to love yourself before you can love someone else.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #7 She Has Her Ex On Speed Dial

I’m going to come right out and say it, your girlfriend chatting to her ex on a regular basis if they broke up less than 6 months ago is a really bad sign.

Chatting to an ex from time to time is ok. In fact, I would even argue that a girl blocking every one of her exes is a red flag all of its own.

BUT, frequent contact with her immediate ex indicates the relationship is not fully over. You should prepare yourself for the fact there is a good chance you could end up becoming ‘the rebound boyfriend’.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #8 She Is A Drama Queen

Does this one sound familiar?

Somehow, nobody has it worse than your girlfriend. Everything is a soap opera and everyone has a vendetta against her – or so she says.

Engaging in oneupmanship is a contest with no winner.

As on Redditor put it:

“If you’re sick, she’s on her deathbed”

You won’t feel emotionally supported which is incredibly important.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #9 She Does Not Read

red flags in women

If you’re anything like me, you love to read. Maybe you attend courses at the local college or university to expand your horizons, maybe you’re just a generally curious person. If your girlfriend isn’t interested in reading and learning or even looks down on these things, that’s a very bad sign.

As a quick litmus test, ask a girl on a first date if she is reading a book currently. If she hasn’t read any book in the last year, you might want to enquire why that is. Life can be hectic, but a year is a long time…

Ultimately, you are the sum of the people you surround yourself with. How can you learn and grow as a person if your girlfriend or wife is not developing alongside you and not encouraging you?

Want to recommend a book to your girlfriend? Here are 25 books everyone should read.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #10 She Is On The Phone To You 24/7

I love when my wife messages me when she’s out and about. It tells me she’s thinking of me. There’s a natural limit to this though.

Here’s what one Redditor said about an ex though:

“When I told her we texted too much, she would text me saying there were things she wanted to text me about but didn’t because she thought I would get mad at her for texting.”

If your girlfriend is messaging you every hour of the day and expecting you to respond every time, this is overstepping natural boundaries. It will get in the way of you doing focused, productive work and spending quality time with friends and family out of business hours.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #11 She Shares Other People’s Secrets With You

Gossip is sometimes looked down on, but it has played an important function in society for thousands of years – after all, how would one man know another man is a good hunter without already going hunting with them? They would hear it on the grapevine.

Gossip is one thing but what you should never do is share another person’s secrets. If your girlfriend is doing this, she is breaking a bond of trust with her friends by going behind their backs. This also means she is likely sharing your secrets too so be careful what you say.

Here’s a tongue twister a Redditor said they heard as a kid:

What Susie says of Sally says more of Susie than of Sally

Think about it, what’s worse? Someone doing something embarrassing or someone gleefully telling the world about it?


Relationship Red Flags In Women #12 She Plays Games With You

A girl who enjoys playing head games, testing you…

It doesn’t matter if you’re 18 or 88. However old you are, I promise you you’re too old for her and her games. Enough said.

I’ll let the Reddit hivemind sum up here:

We’re not in high school, and you aren’t on the Bachelorette. Be honest, sincere, and forthcoming, and we’ll get along just fine. I’m in my mid-thirties, and thus am too old and rickety to jump through hoops.


Relationship Red Flags In Women #13 Using You To Cheat

They will tell you you’re different to their exes and they would never do it to you. Reality check: you’re not ‘different to their exes’

The hard truth is, they will break up with you too when the next ‘Mr Right’ comes along.


It can be difficult to face objective facts when you’re in a relationship. I hope these red flags help you recognize if you’re in a difficult relationship or, if you don’t see any of these, maybe just appreciate what you’ve got!



Lisita, Ellie. 2013. “The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling”. The Gottman Institute. Link


  • Relationship Red Flags – what did you ignore and later regret? Link
  • What are some subtle relationship red flags that are often overlooked? Link
  • What are some major red flags you should never ignore? Link
  • What is an immediate red flag about someone? Link

The post 13 Relationship Red Flags In Women You Should Never Ignore appeared first on Real Men Real Style.

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Title: 13 Relationship Red Flags In Women You Should Never Ignore
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Mens Health

Failures in Business: The Unseen Stepping Stones to Success

Equally significant is the need for businesses to remain vigilant about broader shifts in both domestic and global markets. Macro factors, whether they’re economic trends, geopolitical events, or emerging global challenges, can have profound ripple effects, impacting even the most niche industries. By staying abreast of these larger market dynamics, businesses can better anticipate risks, adapt to challenges, and capitalize on new opportunities. In an ever-globalizing world, the ability to navigate both the nuances of one’s immediate market and the broader global shifts is what separates thriving enterprises from those that falter.

TACTICAL Takeaway: Stay sharp and monitor your industry’s trends. When things shift, being ahead in understanding consumer habits offers you the flexibility to adjust and succeed. Things can change rapidly and the sooner you have insight into consumer behavior changes, the more opportunities you have to pivot.


Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable

The sports nutrition industry is an interesting, fast-paced vertical where what’s old can quickly become new again but also what worked yesterday likely won’t work tomorrow.

It might seem counterintuitive, but it’s spot-on. Take creatine as an example. It hit the shelves in the early 1990s and quickly became a hit. Yet, a decade later, its demand had waned. Jump another decade to today, and it’s back more popular than ever.

TACTICAL Takeaway: The key for businesses is knowing when to go all-in on a product and when to ease off, as it’s the ever-changing consumer market that truly drives demand.

Never Rest On Your Laurels

Just because something “has always worked” doesn’t mean it’s going to continue to work (or continue to work as efficiently).

In the dynamic world of business, the saying “never rest on your laurels” holds more truth than ever. What propelled a company to success yesterday might not necessarily be the formula for its tomorrow’s success. Market demands, technological innovations, and consumer preferences are in a perpetual state of evolution. While a particular strategy or product might have been a game-changer at one point, there’s no guarantee that it will remain relevant or effective in the future. This inherent unpredictability underscores the need for adaptability and forward-thinking in any business endeavor.

This reality pushes companies to be proactive, always forecasting and adjusting to the next potential shift. Relying solely on past successes can lull businesses into complacency, risking obsolescence in the face of changing tides.

TACTICAL Takeaway: To remain competitive and relevant, businesses need to cultivate a culture of continuous learning, innovation, and agility. In essence, the past can inform and guide, but it’s the vision and readiness for the future that will determine enduring success.

Embracing The Journey

To any entrepreneur reading this: the road to success is rarely a straight one. At times, it may seem like every decision leads to a dead end. But remember, every misstep is an opportunity to learn, grow, and pivot.

The trials you face in business are not meant to discourage you. Instead, they are meant to shape you, refine your vision, and improve your strategy. As the age-old adage goes, “smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.” It’s the challenges that will arm you with the experience and resilience necessary for long-term success.

So, the next time you face a setback, remember that your next big success could be just around the corner. Embrace failure as a part of the process, learn from your mistakes, and continue pushing forward with a renewed sense of purpose and determination.

Lastly, don’t forget to enjoy the journey. With so much time spent working and navigating challenges, it’s essential to find joy and have fun along the way.


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Mens Health

Negativity Is a Losing Mindset

By Marc Lobliner


‘A good coach can change a game. A great coach can change a life.’

I coach my son’s U11 football team. I am just the line coach, but the dudes who coach with me are also in the same mindset as I am.

Positivity wins.

Let’s start off with last weekend’s game.

It’s 0-0, the opening kickoff is a short one and we fall on it.

You can hear our coaches getting our kids fired up and getting the offense ready for play. POSITIVE statements. A lot of “Let’s Go!” and energy.

On the other sideline, you hear the coaches angrily yelling at their players for the execution of the kick.

First play from scrimmage, our line makes every block and opens the outside for our running back to score.

You hear their coaches furiously yelling as we celebrate.

We celebrated and our fullback punched in the extra point.

After the kickoff, our defense held them to four and out. We got the ball again, touchdown. Extra point good.

14-0 in two offensive plays.s

Their coaches were still mad. Angry. Yelling.

We smiled, encouraged our kids, and ended up with a 42-0 mercy-rule win.

Our players are awesome, but not the biggest, not the fastest, not the strongest.

It’s all about culture and what you’re playing for.

We demand a lot of our athletes. Learn your plays, DO YOUR JOB, and we will win.

Every Tuesday after we win, I buy my linemen doughnuts and give them to everyone, telling them that a random lineman (changes weekly) said everyone deserves doughnuts. We don’t punish every mistake with extra running and up-downs. We focus on what we do RIGHT, and not what we do wrong.

The other game one of my linemen got called for a hold. He came off the field expecting to be scolded. I put my arm around him and said, “What happened?” He explained it and then I said, “You’re better than that guy, you don’t need to hold. Show the world how dominant you are!” He didn’t get one call the rest of the game and crushed it.

This is also my management style at work. Managers are usually garbage. You can do 1,000 things right and you mess up once and your manager attacks you.

556494762 fullsizerender 4


Employees typically respond better to positivity, and numerous studies have found that positive reinforcement and a positive work environment can significantly improve employee motivation, performance, and well-being. Here are some reasons why, supported by various studies:

Increased Productivity: According to a study conducted by the University of Warwick, happiness led to a 12% spike in productivity, while unhappy workers were 10% less productive. The research shows that human happiness has large and positive causal effects on productivity.

Better Decision-Making Abilities: Research from the University of Pennsylvania’s Positive Psychology Center found that individuals who were induced to feel positive emotions were better at problem-solving and making decisions than those in a neutral state.

Boosts Creativity: Positive emotions widen attention and allow people to think more broadly and openly. This is discussed in the “broaden-and-build theory” by Barbara Fredrickson, which suggests that positive emotions broaden an individual’s momentary thought-action repertoires.

Enhanced Team Collaboration: A study from MIT’s Human Dynamics Laboratory found that teams that communicate effectively, with members actively reaching out and connecting with all other team members, were more successful. Positive interactions contribute to this dynamic.

Reduced Employee Turnover: According to the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM), a positive work environment and culture encourages employees to stay longer in their jobs, thus reducing turnover rates. This is KEY at where our staff has mostly been there for 5+ years!

Better Health & Well-being: A study published in the Journal of Applied Psychology found that positive work environments and low job stress are linked to better health outcomes for employees, which in turn can lead to reduced absenteeism and increased productivity.

Increased Engagement: According to Gallup, workers who are engaged and have high well-being are more likely to be attached to their organizations and are more productive.

Enhanced Learning & Flexibility: Research in the field of positive psychology has shown that positive emotions can facilitate adaptive thinking and flexibility in cognitive processing. This helps employees adapt to new situations and learn more effectively.

Higher Levels of Satisfaction: A study by BrightHR found that happiness is a key indicator of job satisfaction. Happy employees are more likely to report high levels of satisfaction with their jobs than those who report low levels of happiness.

Creates a Positive Feedback Loop: A study published in The Journal of Positive Psychology found that experiencing positive emotions leads to higher levels of resilience, which in turn leads to increased positive emotions. This positive feedback loop has a myriad of beneficial effects in the workplace.

How about parenting?

Same thing. PRAISE YOUR CHILD! Make sure they know you love them. While bad behavior should be addressed, be sure to also reward good behavior. Kid had a good day at school? Get him ice cream! Tell him you love him. Say you’re proud of him.

As my mother said, “You catch more flies with honey than with crap.”

And one can’t deny the lifelong impact of a good coach. As the sign in the office says, “A good coach can change a game. A great coach can change a life.”

Be positive and be a winner!

556494785 img 1682 2

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Instagram @marclobliner

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Panatta Super Rowing Page 1

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