Ever find yourself at a bar, standing alone and wishing you could approach that cute girl?
Or maybe you’re at a networking event and you really want to speak to a VIP, but you hesitate and eventually talk yourself out of it.
You think, what’s the point? It won’t go well. I’m not good enough.
Your biggest problem isn’t that you’re not good enough, it’s that you don’t know how to communicate with confidence.
In this article, I’m giving you 9 powerful ways to communicate with confidence and nail that first impression.
You’ll discover how to:
- Practice Visualization
- Conduct A Mental “Double Check”
- Make Small Talk
- Master Your Personal Presentation
- Make Eye Contact
- Build Good Habits
- Master These Confidence Hacks
- Start Working Out
- Nail That First Impression
Communicate With Confidence Tip #1 Practice Visualization
You may think this is cheesy, but top athletes and performers use visualization to win Olympic events and perform at peak levels.
Visualizing in vivid detail is a great way to build motivation towards doing something you may find intimidating because you activate the same sensory and motor parts of the brain involved with the action you’re visualizing.
Meaning that when you’re visualizing, you’re activating the parts of the brain as if you were ACTUALLY doing what you want to do.
So when you visualize communicating with confidence, your brain will trick you into ACTUALLY communicating with confidence.
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Tip #2 Conduct A “Mental Double Check”
When you feel the urge to approach someone, you may hear that inner-critic in your head that speaks up and tells you things about how you’re not good enough or how the interaction will go wrong.
To convey confidence, you’re going to have to control what is going on in your head. What goes on in your head is directly reflected in your verbal and nonverbal cues.
If you’re distracted or nervous, you will find yourself fidgeting or using many “uhs” and “ums” when speaking.
To stay mindful and present, I recommend a practice called the “mental double-check.” I try to do this hourly each day or every few minutes if I’m speaking with someone.
Mental double checks are simply taking a moment to observe what is going on in your mind.
Change your story change your life
You’d be surprised about what you’ll realize when you start mentally double-checking yourself.
You may find that that inner voice is beating yourself up over little things or causing self-doubt. Remember, the stories and narratives you tell yourself become who you are. To build your confidence, you have to master your story by gaining control over that inner voice.
Learning how to communicate with confidence takes time, energy, and effort. But it’s essential to take the first step and begin identifying the types of stories you’re telling yourself.
So set reminders every few hours to start to observe what is happening in your mind. Are you presently focused on something important, or is your mind adrift?
You can also make it a practice to do mental double checks when you’re speaking to people. It’s a great way to make sure you stay engaged with the person you’re talking to, which is key when you’re learning how to communicate with confidence.
If you double-check yourself and realize that your mind has wandered, don’t beat yourself up about it. Just have a specific “Plan B” for this scenario.
The point is that to be “in control” of your mind, it’s essential to stay present. Staying present means being in the moment versus ruminating about the laundry you have to do when you get home; or all the negative self-talk about how the person you’re speaking with may be judging you.
Tip #3 Make Small Talk
As a communication coach, I always hear people complain about how small talk sucks, but guess what, guys? It’s super important. Here’s why:
When people make first impressions, they mainly look for two main characteristics that account for 80-90% of their impressions: trustworthiness and confidence. But trustworthiness is the most critical piece.
Most men make the mistake that they’re so obsessed with showing power and confidence that they forget about the importance of trustworthiness.
Amy Cuddy, the Harvard social psychologist, recommends using small talk to build trust by genuinely trying to learn about someone else. It conveys trust and warmth.
Tip #4 Master Your Personal Presentation
Research has shown that clothing is another crucial factor when it comes to making first impressions.
But the most important thing to be aware of is your audience. How are people going to dress?
You don’t want to be standing out like a sore thumb.
If you’re going to an event, ask if there’s a dress code. If it’s a party, you can also ask the host what type of attire the guests will be wearing if you’re unsure.
Here are some ways for you to make your appearance work for you:
- Get a great haircut – Research from Yale shows that ‘bad hair days’ dramatically affect self-esteem and social insecurity.
- Pull your socks up – Sloppy socks are for little boys, not men. Walking around with messy clothes tells your brain that you are not a man who strives for high ideals or achieves excellence.
- Tuck in your shirt – Solid, put together, and you mean business. Tucking your shirt in sends the right messages.
- Shine your shoes – Looking down and seeing that perfect mirror shine reminds you that you live by the highest standards.
- Wet shave – Wet shaving with a metal razor gives you a closer, smoother shave, is better for your skin, and saves you about $300 a year over cartridge or electric razors. And it leaves you feeling powerful, stylish, and manly.
- Take care of your nails – Taking care of your nails isn’t just for women. A gentleman’s nails should be neatly filed short, cleaned, and buffed.
- Wear a watch – A good-looking timepiece makes you feel powerful and masculine. It can be a status symbol or a talking point.
Tip #5 Make Eye Contact
Since your goal is to make an effective first impression that conveys trust, one of the best ways to show that is to use eye contact.
It helps show someone that you’re present and paying attention, thus making them feel important. Don’t you hate when you’re talking to someone, and they’re glancing around the room or checking their phone?
Studies show that adults make eye contact between 30-60% of the time, but people should be making eye contact 60-70% of the time to create a sense of emotional connection which is what you’re trying to build.
Start practicing your eye contact. If you don’t feel comfortable doing it, here are a few tips:
- Lock both of your eyes on one eye of the other person if you feel uncomfortable having a direct gaze at both of their eyes.
- If you’re still uncomfortable making direct eye contact, you can focus on one eyebrow of the other person; since it’s close enough to their eyes, they’ll assume you’re looking in their eyes even though you aren’t.
- Make eye contact a habit. You can do this by practicing making eye contact for a few seconds with strangers. The point is to make it a habit, so it becomes automatic.
Tip #6 Build Good Habits
Confidence for men is waning in this day and age. Expectations are high – whether in school, work, or in the bedroom. I get it; it can seem overwhelming at times.
But creating these 5 good habits will go a long way to boosting your ability to communicate with confidence:
- Comparison – We’re surrounded by images of the so-called “perfect” man. He’s a man with a perfect gym body. We see success stories involving guys achieving great things in their 20s while we’re here still trying to figure out our own lives. Detox from social media.
- Change the way you look at yourself – Develop a support system with those closest to you. We’re talking family, friends, and especially your significant other. Seek them out and ask them what makes you a fantastic guy.
- Get organized with micro-actions – Build confidence and momentum by accomplishing as many small tasks as you can each day.
- Be prepared – Savings account, first aid, self-defense – being prepared makes you feel like there’s nothing you can’t handle.
- Be grateful – Express your gratitude every time it occurs to you – don’t hold back!
Tip #7 Try These Confidence Hacks
I’m sure you have heard the phrase, “Fake it ’til you make it.” There are a lot of ways that you can communicate with confidence even if you don’t feel it.
Showing confidence to others gives them the impression that you have confidence. They then show you the faith that your confidence gave them, raising your confidence FOR REAL.
But there are some other unconventional hacks you can use to communicate with confidence:
- Duct tape your back – Fix your posture by using duct tape on your back. Stand up straight and run a long piece of duct tape down your back. Every time you slouch during the day, the tape will tug at your skin and remind you to keep your back vertical.
- Shock your system – Cold shower therapy was used to treat anxiety and depression and improve blood circulation and skin tone in ancient Ayurvedic medicine. Exposure to the cold reduces the incidence of colds by strengthening their immune system.
- Focus on your breathing – Focus on your breathing and take time out to concentrate on your inner state.
- Change your walk – When you walk into a room, walk purposely towards a person or a spot in the room. Having a focus makes you appear more confident.
- Get nude – Being confident in one’s skin has a massive effect on self-esteem. If you struggle with your body image, your self-esteem and confidence take a pretty big hit. Of all the bizarre confidence boosters, getting naked does a lot to boost your confidence levels!
Tip #8 Start Working Out
A meta-analysis conducted in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology has a lot to say about men’s confidence. The experiment indicated that regular exercise improves body image and confidence as a result.
Exercise mitigates the effects of cortisol – a stress hormone – and releases endorphins, improving your overall happiness.
Hit the gym, gents.
Build a routine for yourself and stick to it.
Tip #9 Nail That First Impression
Think about it, have you ever met someone and immediately formed a strong opinion about them? Snap judgments happen extremely quickly – studies have shown that these opinions form in one-tenth of a second.
Of all the characteristics we use to judge people, researchers found that attractiveness and trustworthiness are the characteristics we judge first.
Once you decide whether or not you like someone, it’s pretty hard to change your mind.
Why? Humans are lazy, and after forming that opinion, there’s a ton of cognitive processing (aka brain power) involved in figuring out whether your snap judgments are accurate or not.
Instead, confirmation bias gets the best of you so that you seek information that confirms what you already think about someone and that strengthens the initial judgment. As you can see, it becomes a vicious cycle.
Your social skills and confidence are intertwined; by actively working on improving these aspects of your life, you’ll find yourself feeling naturally confident in social situations.
To improve your confidence, use the strategies we discussed like visualization, power poses and becoming aware of what is going on in your mind.
When it comes to approaching people, remember that first impressions matter. The goal of approaching people is to make them feel comfortable and meaningful. You can do this by using small talk, making sure you look presentable, and maintaining eye contact.
This is a guest post by communication coach Katrina Razavi, founder of CommunicationforNerds.com.
Click below to watch the video – 10 Powerful Signs Of A Confident Man
The post 9 Powerful Ways To Make A Great First Impression appeared first on Real Men Real Style.
Title: 9 Powerful Ways To Make A Great First Impression
Sourced From: www.realmenrealstyle.com/tips-increase-confidence/
Published Date: Tue, 05 Oct 2021 11:59:00 +0000
How to wear your watch correctly
As much as you won’t like hearing this, you’re probably wearing your watch wrong.
It’s not your fault; you may have never been taught how to wear a watch properly. After all, there is more than one way to wear a watch.
But how do you know which way is the right way?
Don’t worry, gents; as always, I’ve got you covered. I’m here with the best way to wear your favorite timepiece properly and look as stylish as ever.
In today’s article, I’ll be covering:
- Origins Of The Wrist Watch
- What Wrist Do You Wear A Watch On?
- Should You Wear Your Watch Facing Inward Or Outward?
- The Stylish Way To Wear A Watch
#1 Origins Of The Wrist Watch
When it comes to wearing a watch correctly, it’s important to note why the wristwatch came about in the first place.
Dating back to the 1800s, the first watches modified to be worn on the wrist were primarily worn by women as accessories. One of the earliest was created by Patek Philippe as a fashion accessory.
At the start of the 20th century, watchmakers became intrigued about using a wrist-worn timepiece for men in the military. They believed it would help them tell time quickly while on the battlefield.
Watchmakers started modifying pocket watches to fit on a bracelet worn on the wrist. Men would not wear the first iteration of the modern wristwatch until well into the 20th century.
Then developed as a ‘trench watch’ for military use, the earliest wrist watches offered something the pocket watch didn’t have – convenience.
After the wristwatch became less of a fashion accessory and more of a functional tool, watchmakers would spend the next century modifying them into the modern wristwatches we enjoy today.
#2 What Wrist Do You Wear A Watch On?
The age-old question: what wrist to wear a watch on? The answer – it depends.
The reason it depends is that since the creation of the wristwatch, men have mostly worn their watch on their non-dominant wrist. And since most people are right-handed, you would wear your watch on your left wrist.
But this isn’t always the correct answer. You may want to wear your watch on the right wrist if you are left-handed. But you may also want to wear it on your dominant hand.
So how do you know for sure?
The most significant benefit of wearing your watch on your non-dominant hand is that you can quickly put the watch on and navigate the dial more efficiently than with your non-dominant hand.
Wearing your watch on your non-dominant hand is less likely to damage the watch as you tend to do more with your dominant hand. If you were to wear it on your dominant hand, you’re more likely to scratch or ding the watch than on your non-dominant hand.
So the rule of thumb here is to wear your watch on your non-dominant hand for the best way to navigate and protect your watch.
#3 Should You Wear Your Watch Facing Inward Or Outward?
The next question is, why would a man wear his watch facing inward on his wrist instead of outward?
This trend is seen primarily in individuals who need to check their watch frequently and in the most efficient way possible. Among the many reasons you should wear a watch, one of the most common is to support you in your profession.
You will see men in the military do this, as it’s easier and prevents sun glare better than when it’s on the outside of the wrist. It also offers faster convenience to other tools on the watch in addition to the time.
Another reason you may want to wear your watch facing inward is that it can help protect your watch from scratches and dings. Again, this is just a preference.
But you’re a stylish guy looking for the best way to wear his watch. What should you do?
The answer here is to wear it facing outward, as that is the most common way to wear a wristwatch. It shows off your timepiece that you love while also still being functional.
Unless you’re in a profession where you need to check your watch quickly while managing other tasks, the best way is to have your watch facing outward. After all, you probably didn’t spend money on that beautiful timepiece to hide its character.
#4 The Stylish Way To Wear A Watch
Now it’s time to find out exactly how to wear a watch in the most stylish way a guy can.
Assuming you’ve selected the right size watch for your wrist, the first thing you want to do is figure out if you’ll be wearing your watch on your right or left wrist.
As mentioned above, traditionally, the watch is worn on your non-dominant wrist. So if you’re right-handed, this means wearing your watch on your left wrist. For left-handed guys, this means your right wrist.
After you figure that out, it’s quite easy. The first thing you want to do is locate your wrist bone.
You want to wear your watch face up just above your wrist bone. If done correctly, your watch should slightly peek out from under the cuffs of your shirt when wearing long sleeves.
Next, you want to tighten the strap so it’s loose enough to be comfortable. You don’t want it so loose it can spin freely around your wrist. You also don’t want it too tight, or it will feel uncomfortable, especially when you bend your wrist.
After doing this correctly, you’ll be wearing a watch in the most stylish way possible.
There you have it, gents.
Now you no longer have to worry about wearing your watch incorrectly.
There is more than one way to wear a watch, so find what’s most comfortable for you personally, and rock your favorite timepiece accordingly.
If you want to take your watch knowledge to the next level, check out this article I wrote about the difference between quartz and mechanical watches.
The post How To Wear A Watch The Right Way appeared first on Real Men Real Style.
Title: How To Wear A Watch The Right Way
Sourced From: www.realmenrealstyle.com/wear-watch-right-way/
Published Date: Sat, 30 Jul 2022 10:19:42 +0000
Did you miss our previous article…
Fall Capsule Wardrobe Preparation (Buy Now and Get $$$)
We’ve all been there – fall comes around, and you open your closet only to find you have nothing but polos and shorts.
So what’s a stylish guy to do? Pay a premium to build an entire fall wardrobe last minute? Sure, if you’re loaded. But not every guy is that lucky!
Don’t worry; as ever, I’ve got you covered. In today’s article, I’ll show you how to get the best bang for your buck when building your fall capsule wardrobe.
We’ll be covering:
- What Are The Advantages Of A Capsule Wardrobe?
- How Do You Build A Fall Capsule Wardrobe?
- Where Can You Find Deals On Fall Clothing?
- What Are The Best Fall Capsule Wardrobe Essentials?
#1 What Are The Advantages Of A Capsule Wardrobe?
One of the most common headaches guys run into in their closet is having too many clothing options to choose from but not enough of the right options.
While more options aren’t bad, they can be overwhelming, especially when you rarely wear most items. This is where building a capsule wardrobe comes into play.
A capsule wardrobe is a limited selection of clothing items that complement each other. This means you can buy a smaller selection of items and create a larger number of outfits.
This is crucial to understand because most guys don’t have an unlimited budget for buying clothes. A capsule wardrobe allows you to purchase and use items frequently with little redundancy.
But where do you start in building your fall capsule wardrobe?
#2 How Do You Build A Fall Capsule Wardrobe?
After you have put together the perfect capsule wardrobe, you can start to add a few fall-specific items. This is done by adding a few staple pieces that complement what you already have.
For most, fall offers mild temperatures mixed with slightly warmer temperatures.
This means that layering will be of the utmost importance because you may leave the house needing a jacket, but it might be warm enough by midday to sport only the t-shirt underneath.
Start with the basics when building your fall capsule wardrobe and add pieces accordingly.
Keep It Simple
Fall is primetime for layering, so you only need a few outer layers and should focus more on the innermost layers.
You want to make sure that interchangeability is at the top of your list when it comes to your wardrobe. Everything should complement each other for ease of use.
With that said, having a few staples and adding additional items as you change seasons is essential.
For this reason, ensure you have the following items in your fall capsule wardrobe:
- A dark three-piece suit
- A light-colored tweed blazer
- A leather bomber or biker jacket
- An overcoat (dark or light)
- A formal button-up shirt (white)
- 2 casual button-up shirts (flannel or chambray, you choose)
- 2 sweaters (1 shawl, 1 crew neck)
- 2 t-shirts (1 white, 1 black,)
- 2 pairs of Jeans (1 dark, 1 light)
- 2 pairs of slacks/chinos (1 dark, 1 light)
- 2 belts (1 black, 1 brown)
- 1 pair of black dress shoes
- 1 pair of brown oxfords (leather or suede, you decide)
- 1 pair of sneakers (plain white or brown)
- 1 pair of military boots (black or brown)
When it comes to accessories like watches, scarves, or gloves, you can use what you have as most men won’t need all of them, so I won’t count them in.
#3 Where Can You Find Deals On Fall Clothing?
As it is the middle of summer, fall will be approaching quickly.
Now is a great time to snag up some of last year’s sale items at department stores as they usually have sales on previous season items. By now, most men aren’t thinking about what to wear in the fall.
While you still might be able to find good deals on last year’s fall items, it’s usually the most optimal time to purchase these items after the season has ended. This is when retailers try hard to clear space and make room for the next season’s clothing.
When they do this, it is a great time to get excellent deals on items that have just gone out of season.
Another great option to buy men’s clothing is online at your favorite retailers, as they will often have sales and discounts on items they have in their online inventory but are not yet in prime season.
The most expensive items in your fall capsule wardrobe are the ones you want to focus on, as you can often save a significant amount of money out of season for them.
These big ticket items include:
- Your dark three-piece suit and blazer
- Overcoats and jackets
- Dress shoes and sneakers
These items will be some of the most expensive items and can be found discounted out of season. Put these at the forefront of your fall capsule wardrobe search.
#4 What Are The Best Fall Capsule Wardrobe Essentials?
You want to adhere to a few staples when building your fall capsule wardrobe.
Since fall weather can vary, layering will be essential. These few items are crucial as mainstays that can be layered with other items within your wardrobe.
For example, if you experience a rather chilly day in fall and need to wear a suit, an overcoat is essential as that outermost layer because you can simply remove it when you no longer need it.
When it comes to the concept of layering within your fall capsule wardrobe, you want to make sure you nail these following items.
Having a good overcoat to complement your fall capsule wardrobe is crucial.
The overcoat acts as the outermost layer and will be removed whenever you go indoors. This makes for a great option as you can wear it with anything as it offers excellent versatility.
When searching for the perfect overcoat, it’s essential to know your size as they usually come in sizes of suit jackets, not regular sizing. After you’ve nailed the size, focus on color.
Dark-colored overcoats tend to be the most versatile. However, a light camel color can work as well. Stay away from patterns with overcoats as the goal is to be as versatile as possible.
A good leather jacket goes a long way. You can choose a leather biker jacket or a leather bomber; it’s your call.
Biker jackets can be slightly harder to pull off as most of the time, they will have a larger and more aggressive collar, but they still look great.
A leather bomber jacket is an excellent option because it looks great on all body types and often has more options than biker jackets.
For color, opt for black or dark brown, as that gives you the most versatility with other items in your fall capsule wardrobe.
Sweaters are to fall, what t-shirts are for summer. This means they are a critical piece as they are season specific and offer great versatility when it comes to layering.
So how do you find the perfect sweater?
You want options, so have a couple of different collar choices to give yourself the most bang for your buck.
Having a shawl neck sweater and a crew neck sweater ensures you have all your bases covered.
Make sure you choose neutral tones such as greys, creams, and tans for color. This ensures maximum versatility with other items within your wardrobe and gives you the most options.
That’s it, gents.
To learn more about how versatile this concept of capsule wardrobes can be, check out how I turned 16 pieces of clothing into 256 outfits.
The post Preparing Your Fall Capsule Wardrobe (Buy Now And Save $$$) appeared first on Real Men Real Style.
Title: Preparing Your Fall Capsule Wardrobe (Buy Now And Save $$$)
Sourced From: www.realmenrealstyle.com/fall-capsule-wardrobe/
Published Date: Thu, 28 Jul 2022 23:59:00 +0000
The Best Zara Fragrances
We all know of Zara and I’m pretty sure the majority of us own at least one piece from them, but I’m not here to talk about their reasonably priced clothing, I’m here for their fragrance.
Not quite a hidden gem but I don’t feel that they vast range and high quality fragrance that they create is given enough air time, I’m about to change that. The fragrance game is massive at the moment, everyone from the big fashion houses all the way to footballers have a scent on the market and they all carry a hefty price tag, with some of the bigger hitters asking in excess of
£100 for 50ml.
Zara clearly understand the need for a great fragrance but also appreciate not everything has to be overly expensive. I’ve been lucky enough to sample my fair share over the years and wanted to share with you what I feel are some of their strongest.
Tobacco Collective 100ml – £16.99
This is one of my absolute favourites, it works perfectly as an everyday scent. The initial smell is strong and masculine but with undertones of vanilla bourbon help to soften it slightly.
For Him 100ml – £22.99
My current daily spray, its warm, modern and intense. It just so happens to be the perfect blend of three of my favourite scents, bergamot, cardamom and sandalwood. It’s strong yet light, never over powering and leaves a wonderful trail.
Florence 100ml – £16.24
Summer calls for a fresh fragrance and I cannot recommend this highly enough, its light, fresh and citrus scent is perfectly for those warmer days. Notes of black pepper, strawberry and guaiac wood allow this scent to sit gently on the skin with offending the noses of those around you.
Written by Tom Loughran
The post The Best Of Zara Fragrances first appeared on Mens Fashion Magazine.
Title: The Best Of Zara Fragrances
Sourced From: www.mensfashionmagazine.com/the-best-of-zara-fragrances
Published Date: Fri, 22 Jul 2022 09:57:00 +0000
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